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    Momus / Lyrics

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    "Beowulf (I Am Deformed)" Lyrics

    Momus

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    Lyrics

    I have come with my sword Naegling
    And the usual aches and pains
    To defeat Grendel, the monster
    Lately scourge of the Danes
    Showing no mercy in the mead hall
    He laid waste thirty thanes
    In return I will chop off his shoulder
    Then I will deal with his mother

    Where is the disabled loo?
    I'm feeling slightly queasy, woozy
    So would you if you'd had to do
    The things I've had to do
    Slay the good, slay the bad
    Do I have the right to use the disabled loos?
    Did they send the right man from the land of heroes?

    Stop laughing, I am Beowulf
    I give you my oath, as I was born
    I am Beowulf
    I am the hero coming to save you
    And I am deformed

    Cancer gubbins that hangs at my neck like a turkey throat
    Swaddling leather trussing up a shrivelled belly bloat
    Dangling from my orifice is a puzzling speculum drip
    If you promise not to tell anyone I have a hare lip
    A smoking hole and a very large mole
    My face it slithers, my ears are torn

    Don't laugh, I am deformed

    Stop laughing, I am Beowulf
    I give you my oath, as I was born
    I am Beowulf
    I am the hero coming to save you
    And I am deformed

    So go ahead, laugh, you won't be the first
    Richard the Hundredth, the Hunchback laughed
    Henry Dalrymple the simpleton convulsed with mirth
    At this sick rubber joke my bones as they poke out of a
    hole in my skin
    At this helplessly flailing mutant appalling prosthetic
    thalydomide limb
    Have a good laugh while you're at it at my schlong
    My metallic foot brace it scratches and drags
    I dribble down a twig
    I twitch along the ground
    My Breugel boots they beggar belief
    I have the stinky shanks of a hound
    My patchy moustache hides a birthmark
    I have come to save Denmark
    Stop laughing

    Stop laughing, I am Beowulf
    I give you my oath, as I was born
    I am Beowulf
    I am the hero coming to save you
    I am deformed
    This song was submitted on November 21st, 2013 and last modified on November 28th, 2016.
    Copyright with Lyrics © Sony/atv Music Publishing Llc.
    Written by Nicholas Currie.
    Lyrics licensed by LyricFind.

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