"I've Lost Track Of Everything" Lyrics

I can't fucking help it, my bones are shaking under my skin,
my mind so heavy and mouth so empty, I've lost track of everything.
Is this what I always wanted?
I'd wake up scared and shiver back to sleep.
On the long walks home I would ask myself, why are we so alone?
Chasing each others shadows in the dark.
Get me the fuck out of here alive.
And all the answers I can not take,
and the questions make less sense every fucking day.
I've waited long enough for the end.
I've seen snakes with pretty faces and bloodshot eyes.
Nothing will drag me deeper than hearing your voice
from across a dim lit room, nothing will bring me back to life,
the reaper's grip, so tight.
I'm scared, I let those years go to waste,
so long ago the last time I saw your face, as the train pulled away ,
I saw you smile and wave.
I dipped my head and focused on the features of your face
as the hours passed, I wish I never made it home without you
DESTROY ME, DESTROY ME
I've lost track of everything, this life has lost all meaning
its too late. there's no time for goodbyes,
my youth has given up on me, im dying inside,
is this all i know?
this deathbed is my home.