"Gerbil" Lyrics

I bought a gerbil at the petting zoo.
If Richard Gear can do it, I can too.
I get undressed, I start to lube.
I stick the gerbil in the end of the tube.
Wondering just how he'll feel.
Will he like it better than his little wheel?
Careful now, he's right beside me.
One more inch and he's inside me.

Gooooooo, gerbil go!
Burrow harder, burrow deeper.
Be my little chimney sweeper.

One thing I forgot about,
how am I supposed to get you out?

So, now my gerbil's on easy street,
it's warm and cozy, and there's plenty to eat.
This situation is beyond my control,
gotta find a way to get him out of his hole.
I tried crow bars, I tried wires.
I almost had him with a pair of plyers.
I tried cheese, but he's not biting,
I wish this wasn't so exciting.

Gooooooo, gerbil go! ah ah ah
Jesus, I am such a sucker,
please get out you furry fucker.
I think I am getting ill, suddenly, he's very very still.

Now, It's too late, my gerbil died.
I guess I have commited gerbicide.

Here's some advice, it's very clear cut.
If you love your gerbil.
Don't stick him up your buuuuuuuutt.
Don't stick him up your buuuuuuuutt.
Little furry gerbil in your booty hole.

Don't stick him up your put him in your pants and he won't come out.
and he crawling himlalal fingadinging le shillie bobba ding ding yeeeeaaaaahhhhh.