"Funky Cold Medina" Lyrics

And we go a little something like this
HIT IT!!

Alright, dig it.
C'mon

Go cooling at a bar
And I'm lookin' for some action
But like Mick Jagger said
I can't get no satisfaction
The girls are all around
But none of them wanna get wit' me
My threads are fresh and I'm lookin deaf
Yo, what's up with L-O-C
The girls are all jockin
At the other end of the bar
Drinkin' with some no name chump
When they know that I'm the star
So I got up and strolled over
To the other side of the cantina
I asked the guy why you so fly
He said funky cold medina

Funky cold medina

This brother told me a secret
On how to get more chicks
Put a little medina in your glass
And the girls'll come real quick
It's better than any alcohol
Or aprhodisiac
A couple of sips of this love potion
And she'll be on your lap
So I gave some to my dog
When he began to beg
And then he licked his bowl and he looked at me
And did the wild thing on my leg
He used to scratch and bite me
Before he was much much meaner
But now all the poodles run to my house
For the funky cold medina

Y'know what I'm sayin'
I got every dog in my neighborhood
Breaking down my door
I got Spuds McKenzie
Alex from Stroughs
They won't leave my dog alone
With that Medina, pal

I went up to this girl
She said "Hi, my name is Sheena"
I'd thought she'd be good to go
With a little funky cold medina
She said "I'd like a drink"
I said hmm, I'll go get it
And then a couple of sips
She cold licked her lips
And I knew that she was wit' it
So I took her to my crib
Everything went as well as planned
But when she got undressed
It was a big ol' mess
Sheena was a man
So I threw him out
I don't fool around
With no Oscar Mayer Weiner
You must be sure you're girl is pure
For the funky cold medina

Y'know what I'm sayin'
Ain't no plans with a man
This is the eighties
And the Loc is down wit' the ladies
No joke

Break it down

HA HA
HA HA
HA HA

HA HA
HA HA
HA HA

Black in the saddle
Lookin' for a little affection
I took a shot as a contestant
On the Love Connection
The audience voted
And y'know, they picked a winner
I took my date to the Hilton
For medina and some dinner
She had a few drinks
I'm thinking soon what I'll be getting
Instead she started talking about
Plans for our wedding
So I grabbed my coat and hit the door
Said "Baby, I'll be seein' ya"
That's why I found you don't fool around
With the funky cold medina

Y'know what I'm sayin'
That medina's a monster

Funky cold medina