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"Robot Hell" Lyrics

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From "Hell Is Other Robots" (Season 1, Episode 9)

Robot Devil:
Gentlemen?

(Music starts)

Bender:
Aww, crap; singing. Mind if I smoke?

Robot Devil:
Cigars are evil; you won't miss 'em
We'll find ways to simulate that smell
What a sorry fella! Rolled up and smoked like a panatella,
here on level one of Robot Hell!

Gambling's wrong and so is cheating;
so is forging phony I.O.U.s
Let's let Lady Luck decide what type of torture's justified;
I'm pit boss here on level two!

Ooh, deep-fried robot!

Bender:
Just tell me why!

Robot Devil:
Please read this fifty-five page warrant.

Bender:
There must be robots worse than I!

Robot Devil:
We've checked around; there really aren't.

Bender:
Then please let me explain: my crimes were merely boyish pranks.

Robot Devil:
You stole from boy scouts, nuns, and banks!

Bender:
Aww, don't blame me; blame my upbringing!

Robot Devil:
Please stop sinning while I'm singing!

Selling bootleg tapes is wrong;
musicians need that income to survive.

Beastie Boys:
Hey, Bender, gonna make some noise
with your hard drive scratched by the Beastie Boys!

(Record scratching sounds)

That's what-cha, what-cha, what-cha get on level five!

Fry:
I don't feel well!

Leela:
It's up to us to rescue him.

Fry:
Maybe he likes it here in hell?

Leela:
It's us who tempted him to sin.

Fry:
Maybe he's back at the motel?

Leela:
Come on, Fry, don't be scared!
I'm sure at least one of us will be spared,
so just sit back; enjoy the ride.

Fry:
My ass has blisters from the slide!

Robot Devil:
Fencing diamonds, fixing cockfights, publishing indecent magazines...
You'll pay for every crime, knee-deep in electric slime!
You'll suffer 'till the end of time, enduring tortures; most of
which rhyme
Trapped forever here in Robot Hell!
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AddedOctober 25th, 2005
Last updatedMarch 5th, 2022
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